First off—why “day zero”? Because it’s QISE tradition that the opening ceremony is on Day Zero, which begins the whole shebang. (Never mind that early rounds of soccer and the entire archery competition is over.)
Okay, so Day Zero...
- The network has waited since the 1996 Atlanta Games to show the event live in the Eastern Time Zone. With Rio in the Atlantic Zone (only one hour off), it’s all live, all the time, right? Well mostly—the Opening Ceremony and gymnastics will be “curated” and shown “slightly" later. Translation: edited within an inch of it’s life in order to jam in more ads.
- Many of the Peacock family are missing the big show due to concerns over the Zika virus. Savannah Guthrie and Dylan Dreyer of the Today Show are both pregnant so they stayed home. For any on-air talent of child-bearing age in Rio now—how exactly did you explain it to your significant other? “Sorry, honey, it’s my big break!"
- This leaves old fogies Lauer, Vieira, and Kotb to host the Opening Ceremony, with Costas standing by at what I’m calling the Rio Apple Store.
- So, the ceremony—it wouldn’t be QISE without extras from Tron holding aluminum pillows, creepy puppets, the history of the host country via a Cirque du Soleil routine, the cast of Solid Gold, and multicolored Cousin Itts.
- In an unusual move, Rio QISE decided to include an educational message about global climate change. Fox News viewers—avert your eyes.
- In the Parade of Nations, when they mentioned concerns about Germany, I immediately thought of “The Boys from Brazil”. Nope—just a previous soccer loss.
Tomorrow—the Games truly get underway.