We begin with the end of last night’s programming.
- Lipinski and Weir return to cover ladies’ figure skating team short program. They don’t seem quite as chatty during the performances. Doesn’t seem to matter—the internet hates them. I really think the “golf-style” commentary (quiet and reverent) works better.
- The Lipinski/Weir pair loves metaphors. One of the skating pairs were “flowers” that could also “rebuild a car”. Huh?
- The decision to air events like figure skating live is impacting commercial placement. There’s only enough time for one or two ads between the end of a performance and their score. Don’t worry—Kabletown will have plenty of ads.
- In the end, the Team Figure Skating event is an excuse to stretch out a fan favorite during more of the games. Prior to this and the X-Gamey events, QISE was basically one week of skating, one week of skiing.
Onto today’s coverage…
- QISE Channel is doing a daily review show hosted by Jimmy Roberts (who normally narrates pre-produced segments in prime time) with three millennials, including a bearded guy in a flannel shirt. Pandering much?
- There’s also “Gold Zone” if all you want are highlights and medal ceremonies. That show is being produced back in NY. The host looks like he got a hall pass from his high school class.
- Cross-country skiing is all about strategy, which doesn’t lend itself to television. You need someone like the gravelly-voice Al Trautwig to generate drama—and he’s the master. Of course, randomly dropping in commercials at crucial moments doesn’t help.
- We have our first QISE Peacock-gate. Joshua Cooper Ramo, who was brought in as the “Asia Expert” apparently needs more schooling. During the opening ceremony, he inferred that Japan’s occupation of Korea in the first half of the 20th century was a good thing. It made them transform into a technological marvel. Sure there were atrocities (still a diplomatic flashpoint between the countries), but you gotta break a few eggs…needless to say, Ramo’s service are no longer needed at Kabletown.
- Today’s QISE lesson—Curling has no central judge at an event. Basically, the competitors are on the honor system. At one match today, they were asking the crowd for their opinion on whether a stone went out of play (instant replay showed it did not).
- Primetime begins with Tirico escaping the Ski Lodge and appearing at the ice center. It’s all about Figure Skating tonight, especially since Mikaela Shiffrin’s “march to gold” is delayed due to weather.
- But first—let’s show men’s luge for the third? (fourth?) time today. When you see the “X minutes until blah-blah-blah” graphic, that’s means a VP is back at 30 Rock watching real time ratings and panicking.
- After that, and a quick moguls competition in a blizzard, it’s back to the Tara and Johnny Show. A major online meme is that Weir is auditioning to host the Hunger Games.
- All the delayed events are screwing up Kabletown’s schedule, so it’s time to prioritize. Team Figure Skate is live, Women’s Slopestyle moves to late night.
More tomorrow.